Aideen Smith-Watson

How fortunate are we to reside in a country where we can have a say in the future of our family by exercising our vote at the polls (however not always getting the outcome we desired!). Legally we are treated equally and fairly just like every other UK resident.

However for many of our Irish friends they are not so fortunate as their basic human rights are being comprised, as the state currently has a large say in their HAPPINESS!

Karen and I have been together for over 23 years, our romance was kindled over a bowl of chips in the UCD canteen, for the last 17 years we have been based in the UK.

We knew that we always wanted children, and we were together for 18 years before the arrival of our first born, to say our boys were planned is perhaps an understatement! Karen and I had a “commitment ceremony” in Tuscany with our family and friends before civil partnerships were introduced. We witnessed the love, fun and commitment that so many of our straight friends were enjoying through their marriage ceremonies so we decided that we wanted to share “our special day” with our family and friends too. We followed up with our Civil Partnership as soon as it was introduced in the UK. Our first child was born here and we both enjoy legal status as parents. We were very lucky to spend two years working and living in Ireland in 2011-2013, during which time Karen gave birth to our second son Josh, who was born in the Rotunda. Despite being there every step of the way through the planned pregnancy, birth and being the primary carer after Karen returned to work after a short maternity leave. I soon discovered that I was in a legal limbo, as I did not have the same legal “rights” for my youngest precious boy. Under the Civil Partnership Act, there is no provision for adoption or guardianship of children who are being parented by same-sex couples. So in affect as Josh’s de facto parent I could (potentially) not be treated as next of kin in a hospital or school situation, because under Irish Law I am not recognised as a legal parent – I am effectively a stranger in law. It made me feel sick to the core, I may not have given birth to Josh, as I felt he is as much a part of me as my biological son Elliot and I know 100% Karen Smith-Watson feels exactly the same way.

On return to the UK we commenced the legal adoption process, so that I could become Josh’s legal parent, just like Karen is with my biological son, Elliot. This involved a considerable amount of intrusion, visits from social workers, essentially our life was being scrutinised, I was being assessed to ensure I was suitable to be Josh’s “legal” parent. A process we gladly endured to ensure my legal status was instated.

The fact is, banning same sex couples from civil marriage does not stop same sex couples from having children. All it does is stop these families from being recognised in Irish law, and therefore stops children from being protected.

This current “law” is not representative of the gorgeous Irish people who are passionate, kind and caring and hopefully on the 22nd will exercise their vote and give equality for all! Otherwise expect to see me at the European court! Exercise your vote Ireland and vote YES! ‪#‎LoveIsLoveIreland‬ ‪#‎VoteYes‬‪#‎MarRef‬